5 May, 2008
Competitive conversation?
This week, the DailyBide will help us focus on our interpersonal relationships.
In a world filled with celebrities and wannabes seeking their 15 minutes of fame---what is more important than your relationship with the people who mean the most to you?
Our DailyBide writer this week is Jack Crabtree, from Long Island Youth for Christ. Thanks Jack!
Two Ears, One Mouth---Do the Math
Yesterday a lady asked me what was happening in my life. I didn’t get 30 seconds into my answer before she interrupted and started telling me about her life---a rambling three minute commentary.
Does that annoy you? Did she really want to know about me or was her question to me only a launching pad for her to talk about herself? I couldn’t wait to get away from that lady.
What’s worse? I catch myself doing the same thing to other people. While they are talking I’m impatiently thinking about what I am going to say when they pause or stop talking.
I’m not listening to them. I’m thinking about me and what can I say to top their story or impress them. It’s competitive conversation.
photo courtesy images.google.com
James 1:19 (NLT)
Hearing and Doing the Word
19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
What does today’s God’s Story scripture teach us about listening and speaking?
Most of us talk too much. God’s word tells us to use our ears more than our mouths. Most of the time we reverse that order. We are quick to speak and slow to listen. No behavior is more self-centered than our drive to speak and our reluctance to listen. It’s the root cause of most of our conflicts with others.
The anger comes from our frustration when other people think they know us but they aren’t even listening to what we are saying. Our anger starts to boil when people interrupt us and don’t give us a chance to express our opinions and thoughts.
When we listen, we learn. When we are talking we learn nothing about the other person. Becoming a better listener requires an intentional commitment to limit our talking and practice better listening. That’s why the Bible tells us, “Be quick to listen and slow to speak.”
How can we connect my story to God’s Story Scripture?
When we listen, we love. Giving people our full attention and taking time to listen as they say what is on their mind is a clear demonstration of love and affirmation. One of the helpful thoughts about God is his willingness to listen. The Bible says his ear is not so heavy that he cannot hear (Isaiah 59:1). His ear is open to the cries of his people (Psalm 34:15). We know God loves us because he pays attention to us and encourages us to talk to him. God wants us to treat others the way he treats us.
How can we connect today’s story and God’s Story and our story to their story?
- People listen to people who listen. 3Story strongly teaches this simple principle.
- Everyone has an ongoing life story. Take time to hear it and understand it.
- Giving time, attention and a listening ear is a practical act of love to people who need to experience God’s love.
- Attentive listening provides insight about a person’s needs and their openness to God’s Story.
- God’s Story is best told and received when people know they are loved and accepted.
- Intentionally reduce how much you talk this week and increase how much you listen.
- Learn as much as you can about the people in your life who need Jesus.
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